


A Hundred Echoes

by Chimeraspeak, tinypinkmouse



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Gen, Podfic, Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic Available, Podfic Length: 20-30 Minutes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-14
Updated: 2018-09-14
Packaged: 2019-06-22 18:15:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15587841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chimeraspeak/pseuds/Chimeraspeak, https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinypinkmouse/pseuds/tinypinkmouse
Summary: There are days when Deanna might wish she'd chosen any other career path.





	A Hundred Echoes

Streaming and download link [here](http://pod-together.parakaproductions.com/2018/A%20Hundred%20Echoes.mp3)

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"And how are things going with the Mitchell's?" 

Deanna felt like sighing at the innocuous question. "There's been some progress." As soon as she'd said it, she wanted to cringe at the amount of defensiveness that the answer gave away. 

"You never specialized in family counseling, Deanna." The sympathetic answer failed to actually make her feel any better. 

"I'm still qualified," Deanna said, failing entirely to hide her irritation. She clasped her hands and took a deep, calming breath. There had been a few rather busy days on the bridge while they barely managed to avoid letting a first contact situation devolve into conflict with a species that had felt hostile from the get go. 

Deanna certainly didn't resent her role on the bridge, she knew her advice during this situation, as well as many past incidents, had been valuable. If she ever doubted it, her captain's occasionally blatant feelings of gratefulness would be more than enough to reassure her, if his words alone had not been enough to do so. However, she did perhaps sometimes feel frustrated at the amount of appointments it meant she had to miss with crew members when her other duties took precedent. 

"You've certainly had a fair amount of practice since being posted to the Enterprise." 

She finally let the sigh escape her. She looked at the unremarkable looking middle aged human woman across from her, she'd thought about talking to one of her old teachers the first time she'd come here, but ultimately she'd decided against it as it would have been more unsettling than anything else. She had finally settled on someone that seemed reassuring while bearing no personal meaning to her at all. 

After all, to her the hologram would never feel like anything more than exactly what it was. An empty simulacrum that she could spill out her worries to. For a moment she thought of Data and felt a brief stab of guilt before dismissing the feeling, she certainly didn't think Data was anything like the holodeck simulations. 

"There are times I wish I wasn't posted to a ship that needs me both on the bridge and as a regular ship's counselor," she admitted. Oh, she didn't want to leave the Enterprise, but she could admit that there were days that the workload felt like a burden. 

Deanna opened her mouth to express some of that out loud, when she was distracted by— something. 

"I don't think anyone would blame you for that, Deanna," the hologram continued on, but Deanna was hardly paying attention anymore. 

Something felt wrong, something that stood out from the normal background hum of the crew's feelings. She tapped her communicator. 

"Troi to the bridge…" she started, but never had the time to finish her sentence. 

*** 

Deanna woke with a splitting headache. She gave out a small groan and carefully opened her eyes. She blinked a few times at the low light, but it wasn't making her headache any worse at least. She sat up from the floor so she could take a look around herself. 

She'd been on the holodeck—hadn't she? 

"Computer, end program." The empty, blandly grey coloured room she seemed to find herself in stayed exactly the same as before. "Computer, arch." She tried again, with the same lack of result. 

So, either the holodeck was malfunctioning, or she was somewhere else entirely. She wished she could do something about the headache, it was distracting enough that she couldn't quite make sense of what she was sensing from around her. 

She touched her communicator. "Troi to the bridge." She waited for a moment without any reply. She touched the communicator again. "Troi to Enterprise." 

There was no answer. She pressed the communicator once more. "Troi to Enterprise!" Still no answer. 

_Well, there's no point in sitting on the floor feeling sorry for yourself_ , Deanna thought. Gingerly she rose up, brazing herself for any eventual dizziness, but she had no trouble at all. Whatever had happened, apart from the headache it didn't seem to have left her with any other ill effects. She rubbed at her temple with one hand, either she was getting used to the headache or it had actually lessened a bit into a dull and highly distracting throb. 

_Time to see if there's a way out of this room_ , she told herself, taking a few steps to reach one of the walls. At first glance there didn't seem to be any doors, but she knew that meant very little. She reached out a hand to touch the grey wall, and as her fingertips brushed against the metal it shimmered and then seemingly melted away. 

She hesitated for a moment before stepping out into the corridor. She tried to concentrate on what she was feeling from around her, but the sudden spike of pain in her head made her reconsider that plan. She was definitely sensing something, she just couldn't concentrate enough to tell what it was. 

The corridor was lit just as dimly as the room she'd woken up in. At least the low lighting wouldn't make her head any worse, but it made the place seem eerie. It certainly didn't help how unsettled she felt. 

As she walked down the corridor she thought that she could detect it curving slightly to the right, but since there was no distinguishing features at all it was almost impossible to be sure. Maybe she was just imagining things. 

After walking for awhile she stopped, a thought occurring to her. The doorway to her room hadn't been distinguishable to her until she'd tried touching the wall and it had opened up, there was no telling how many doors she could have passed by now. 

_Why didn't I think of that earlier?_ There was no point berating herself for that now. She'd simply have to check from now on. She took a step closer to the wall, running her hands over the smooth surface. Her touch revealed nothing more than her eyes had; a seemingly continuous piece of wall. _If I have to do this to every inch of wall here, I'll be here forever._

She turned to look back the way she'd come, but it still looked just the same as it had moments ago. The earlier doorway had opened at just the slightest touch from her fingertips, hadn't it? _I'll just have to hope that's enough._

She continued walking closer to the wall, letting her right hand run along the smooth surface. She could check the left hand wall coming back, unless she found something first. She'd only taken a few steps before the wall beneath her hand started to shimmer. She didn't even have time to step to the side so that she wouldn't be quite so exposed to whatever was on the other side before the wall vanished, just as had happened earlier. 

She looked at the little room, identical to the one she'd found herself in earlier. She cast another glance down the corridor, to where she'd come from, and thought about the curvature she thought she'd noticed to the corridor she'd been walking. _For all I know, it might_ be _the same room._ She felt the touch of despair colouring the thought. With a deep breath she let the feeling flow out of her. This place was just making her uneasy, there'd been nothing overtly hostile yet and no reason to think she wouldn't find her way out of here. 

This time she had to walk for a bit longer, but soon enough the wall started to shimmer under her fingers. Deanna was more prepared for it this time around pulling her hand back and taking a quick step back, just in case something was waiting for her on the other side. The doorway opened even if she wasn't touching it anymore. 

She didn't normally even carry a phaser on away missions, but she found herself wishing for one right then. Carefully Deanna peered around the doorway. For a split second she froze at the sight of Data lying prone on the floor of another identical little room. 

"Data!" Deanna exclaimed and hurried to his side. There was no reaction at all from Data. She futilely shook his shoulder, just in case. "Data!" 

If there was any chance that Data would wake up on his own, surely he would have done so already. After all, he must have been here just as long as Deanna. It wouldn't take that long for him to reboot, right? Deanna did the only thing she knew how to and reached for his off switch. 

She flicked the switch, hoping that it would work. There was nothing she could do for Data if it didn't. _And I could use the company._

When Data opened his eyes Deanna smiled with pure relief. "Counselor?" Data asked as they both got up from the floor. 

"I don't know where we are," Deanna told him. "I woke up in a room just like this." 

*** 

It turned out Data couldn't tell where they were either. The last thing he could remember was entertaining Spot in his quarters. At least he could tell her that he'd been offline for fiftyseven minutes and a number of seconds. If that was accurate, then at least they hadn't been gone for long and there was still a good chance that the Enterprise would find them. 

It didn't take them long to find out that even Data couldn't see anything at all that stood out in the bland grey walls. To make things worse they soon located another of the small rooms and quickly found out that the doorways that were impossible to find until they opened under her touch would only react to Deanna. 

She felt oddly relieved when Data confirmed that the corridor was actually curved. At least she hadn't imagined that. 

They'd been walking along for some time, pausing only to check out the occasional empty room that Deanna's touch had revealed. Data told her that the rooms were situated at regularly lengthening intervals, which was something she was content to take his word for. They'd switched to the left side of the wall for a time, but there'd been nothing at all to be found on that side, while on the right side of the corridor the door was exactly where Data predicted. 

"I believe the corridor is a spiral." Data stopped and then pointed at the wall. "The next doorway should be here." 

Troi stepped forward and touched the wall. It shimmered away again to reveal yet another identical and empty room. It was nothing more than what she expected by now, but there was still a small bite of disappointment nonetheless. _Hope is a good thing_ , she reminded herself. 

What was it about this situation that was making her feel so dejected? She'd certainly been in worse places than this without having to fight off this constant sense of hopelessness. 

"A spiral?" Deanna asked, at least partly to distract herself from her own thoughts. "Which way are we going?" She added, remembering at the last moment that she didn't need an explanation on how he knew, or how much the spiral curved or possibly what a spiral was. 

"Outward." Data looked thoughtful. "I cannot tell when we will reach the end of the corridor," he said carefully, like he was trying not to upset her with the information. 

She wondered if it was really that easy to tell how unsettled she was at the moment. Or maybe her feelings were just making her read too much into Data's words. "So, I woke up in the center of the spiral?" She wondered if there was any significance to that. 

"I cannot say for sure, Counselor." Data answered her, still sounding a bit careful to her ears. "But it is possible." 

"The corridor only led one way," Deanna said, frowning when she realised that she hadn't ascribed that any significance before. 

"You did not inform me of that earlier." Now Deanna was sure she was reading into things, because Data wouldn't actually berate her for forgetting to mention that, even if it might be justified. 

"I didn't think of it," Deanna said, frowning. 

Data's brow furrowed slightly. "Are you still experiencing a headache?" 

"I…" Deanna began, and then paused. She'd almost gotten used to the feeling by now, but the throbbing was still there when she thought about it. She tried to concentrate on what she was sensing from around her. She drew in a sharp breath as the throbbing intensified, lifting her right hand to cup the side of her head. "Definitely still there," she said with a grimace. 

"You have seemed somewhat… distracted, Counselor." 

_That's a delicate way of putting it,_ Deanna thought, the level of her irritation at Data's words taking herself by surprise. 

"Have you considered that it might be deliberate?" 

She'd considered it when she'd first woken up, hadn't she? Deanna moved her hand to rub at her temple, not caring about the outward sign of her discomfort. It wasn't like Data didn't already know she wasn't feeling well. _Why didn't I think of it?_ She tried again to concentrate on her empathy, despite the headache. 

She bent her head, hands flying to both her temples. She pressed down as the throbbing in her head kept intensifying. 

"Counselor?" Data asked, sounding worried. 

She didn't have enough energy to spare for an answer, and instead simply ignored Data. Deanna fought through the throbbing in her head, trying to grasp that elusive feeling of something out there. 

Distantly she realised Data had caught her before she could buckle to her knees, but that wasn't important now. _I can almost…_ _right there…_ The pressure in her head kept building as she pushed her abilities to their limit. 

And then, for a moment the headache didn't matter, her surrounding didn't matter, as for a fleeting moment she felt _them_. The source of her distraction, the reason why she'd been so unbalanced since she'd woken up here. Curiosity and worry and… the voices were too loud! 

Her head exploded into blinding agony, as the connection vanished as suddenly as it had appeared. 

"Not hostile," she managed to breathe out, between gasps of pain. "We need to… need to get to… the end. Have to… explain..." She didn't have the energy to fight of the darkness for longer, and quietly slipped into unconsciousness. 

*** 

"Counselor?" Deanna winced at the loudness of the voice. 

"Data?" She whispered, and carefully cracked her eyes open. She was lying on the floor again, this time with her head pillowed in Data's lap. 

"We have reached what would appear to be the end of the spiral. But I cannot detect a doorway, nor did your touch appear to be able to open anything while you were still unconscious." He'd lowered his voice marginally, but it still sounded too loud. 

Laboriously Deanna pushed herself up. "Data, did you carry me?" 

"Yes," he answered matter of factly. "You did say we needed to get to the end. I concluded that you most likely meant the end of the spiral. Perhaps the doorway will respond to you now that you have regained consciousness." 

The steady throbbing of earlier seemed like a fond memory compared to the constant agony and buzzing inside her head. The mental voices of the beings that had taken her here too close and too strong for her strained mind to deal with. 

"Help me up, Data?" 

With Data's help she managed to walk over to the wall at the end of the spiral corridor. She pressed a shaking hand against it, immediately the buzzing in her head grew more intense, even if she still could make no real sense of it. Instead of shimmering away like the earlier doorways the wall started to emit a dim glow. 

"Please," Deanna breathed out quietly, her mind too tired to project her thoughts. "You're hurting me." 

The sense of dismay and regret was brief, but clear, before the buzzing grew a bit more quiet. _I can't keep this up long._

"I _want_ to go back to the Enterprise." She wasn't sure why, but it felt important to emphasize that she wanted to leave. Something she'd picked up on that earlier, brief contact, maybe? 

She felt the surprise at her words, and then… worry. _For me?_

"Counselor?" Data asked, but she barely heard him over the noise in her head. She could barely manage to form coherent thoughts above all the noise. 

"I think they're worried about me going back," Deanna told Data. Maybe he would think of an answer that she couldn't. 

"Counselor Troi is in more distress here than she would be on the Enterprise," Data said to the empty air. "You may be causing her permanent harm." 

"Confusion," Deanna rasped out as she tried to discern the alien emotions. "Conflict. Resentment." She felt like sobbing with pain or frustration. "I don't understand!" 

The buzzing grew overwhelming and a brief image of herself on the holodeck from before all of this had happened flashed in her mind. The noise suddenly grew less distracting again, and she realised Data must have pulled her away from the wall. 

"Counselor?" He was asking her. "Counselor, are you alright?" 

She tried to wave a hand at Data, too tired for any more words than was necessary. "I was tired," she said out loud. "I _am_ tired. I still like my work." She nodded at the wall, trying to convey to Data to help her back to it. 

"Counselor…" he said with some disapproval. "Are you sure that is a good idea?" 

She squeezed Data's arm wordlessly. He gave a nod and helped her forward. 

She reached out to the wall again, the dim light shining out from between her fingers. _I want to go home,_ she projected with her last strength, pushing her tired, jumbled feelings out at the vastly more powerful entities. 

*** 

This time Deanna woke up with the familiar ebb and flow of the collective feelings of the Enterprise crew's feelings humming in the back of her mind. It all felt muted though, and if she tried to concentrate on it at all it seemed to slip through her fingers as a dull ache started behind her eyes. 

"Stop that," a blessedly familiar voice told her, as something beeped in warning. 

"Beverly." Deanna breathed out in relief and let the constant background hum of the crew fade until she could barely feel it, before finally opening her eyes to look at her friend and the comfortingly familiar sight of sickbay. 

"You shouldn't even be awake yet," Beverly told her, frowning with lingering worry. "You exhausted yourself and your paracortex needs the time to recover." 

Deanna nodded slightly in understanding, relishing at the lack of pain in her head. 

"Data?" She asked quickly, in case Beverly was about to suggest putting her back under to get that much needed rest. She wasn't going to argue, but she needed to know first. 

Beverly gave her a knowing look. "He's fine," she said gently. 

"I just want to see him, Beverly," Deanna told her quietly. "Then I'll sleep for however long you want me to," she added, giving Beverly a small smile. 

"Fine. But I'll hold you to that." 

*** 

Waiting for Data gave her some time to think about what had happened. Some of her questions, like how they'd gotten back to the Enterprise, could wait for later. But there were plenty of things that only she had the answers to, and even so, she thought they'd never find out the complete reason why she'd been taken. 

"You wanted to see me, Counselor?" 

She nodded, her eyes briefly raking over Data and finding nothing at all visually wrong with him. It was difficult sometimes to care for someone when she couldn't feel if they were alright or not. 

"I'm sorry," she told him. 

He furrowed his brow in what looked very much like confusion. She wondered, not for the first time, how much of that was real and how much was him mimicking the people around him to make them more at ease. She wondered if it made any difference. 

"Why?" 

"Because you wouldn't have been in that situation if it wasn't for me." She wasn't going to explain that she thought it was a stray thought she'd had comparing Data to a hologram that had caused the entities to be— curious about him, maybe? She might just be worried about feelings Data didn't have, but there was no reason to share any doubts about his personhood that she hadn't truly harbored since the early days of getting to know him. "They didn't really want you." 

There was a brief, thoughtful silence before Data spoke. "I am glad I was there, Counselor." 

_That's Data for you,_ she thought. _Always both kind and sincere._

She smiled at him. "So am I, Data." 

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from a quote by Milan Kundera: “For there is nothing heavier than compassion. Not even one's own pain weighs so heavy as the pain one feels with someone, for someone, a pain intensified by the imagination and prolonged by a hundred echoes.”


End file.
